Need Help dealing with my WAW

[sandi2]

Okay, I see why you've been so clingy with the TM's. But, it doesn't improve things, does it?

I believe you definitely need to control the money! She's not withholding information to "protect you", she's trying to save her own hide! Sweetie, you've got to face some facts.....beginning with she can't be trusted to handle the family budget when she is partying 3-4 nights a week.

You don't show her you trust her with the financial welfare of the family when she's waving red flags all over the place. If she wants to be trusted with that level of finance, then IMHO, she would need to start with a better track record.

According to her behavior, her mind is clearly not on being a good wife & mother. Do you think she is being a good role model? Is she financing these all-nighters with her money or is that part of the "budget" you are paying?

Got home from work around 5:30. W informs me she was invited to a party by a girl in her community college class.

Short notice for someone who tells you to give more advance notice, don't you think?

I wasn't expecting her to have plans tonight

Beginning now, "expect" it. Beginning now, have your own plans that doesn't revolve around her.

I said "Can you bring a guest, it sounds like fun".

I'm sure you didn't intended to appear weak, but many WAYs would see that as such. Now look very carefully at her answer:

She quickly replied that only she got invited and it would be rude if she brought me.

Really?

Why would a woman/mother her age go to anything where it would be considered "rude" to take her H as her escort? You see the signs. If she won't be honest with you, at least be honest with yourself and realize that you've got to step-up and save your family. She's in a bad place and I don't think you can depend upon her right now, do you?