My wife just sent me an email saying she has had the divorce papers notarized and is sending them to me tomorrow.
I am still shocked that she is doing this knowing it will not only prevent me from coming back into the states and seeing her, it will significantly reduce the income I have been working so hard to build in order to support her, and leave me unable to enter the states at all for another 5 years.
This is incredibly frustrating because it can be easily and legally avoided, and she has been unwilling to even hear anything to do with that.
This is very troubling to me because it not only shows a lack of willingness, but also a lack of ability for us to work together and overcome our challenges. If we really can't work together, then who the heck am I kidding?
So I guess now my true test really begins.
How gracefully can I let go. And where on earth will it lead?
Right now I'm having a pretty hard time believing that I would want to reconcile with a woman who was so willing to leave me stranded without even looking at the facts.
And I am having an equally hard time believing that this woman who I love can be some stubborn and bull-headed.
And on top of that, all these pesky thoughts, feelings and images of her finding a man who does more for her sexually than me - God that drives me totally insane.
Do guys ever really get over there wife being with another man? Can I really take that on as just another "life lesson" that help me to improve and reconcile with my wife?
I guess if that is what it takes but honestly for the first time I am really starting to wonder if I even want to.
Anybody have any ideas for how I should proceed?
I'm thinking maybe I'll just wait a few days for the papers to arrive and then take it from there, but even once they arrive, I'm not really sure what I should say or do.
Any opinions, advice or counsel from anyone would be greatly appreciated. I'm feeling terribly sad, angry and confused.
Thanks again.
I am being the possibility of:
1) Integrity 2) Loving myself completely. 3) Things flowing naturally between us, without any fear or attachment to the outcome.
