Well for those of u that have been keeping up with my stich you know that i have been separated for 5 months cause my wife wasn't happy. She and I both filed for divorce and have a court date March 14. She went three months of ignoring me not answering text messages and basically avoiding me while i did everything i wasn't supposed to do including making unsupported accusations and basically being very mean to her. Well Two nights ago she sent me a sexually explicit video she says she found of me and her and engaged in a very sexually charged conversation with me for approximately 2 hrs. Yesterday she asked if i could loan her 200 dollars for school expenses which i did. Today she has engaged in both initiated and non initiated conversations with me all day including telling me every where she was going and asking if i was going to our best friends bday party Saturday night which i told her i didn't know. We engaged in conversation about my work and she text me and said she was going to lunch and later text me a said her girlfriend said hi. I just dont know what to make of it is she having a change of heart or just softening me up.
Sounds positive to me. Just try to not get too excited and play it cool. Love the advice my db coach had, avoid emotions of 1& 10, keep it between 4 & 6. Good luck!
BITS
Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.
I agree, it sounds positive, maybe she is letting the "wall" between you two come down a little.. Proceed with caution, don't pounce, just take baby steps and they will eventually add up.
Me-43,W-41 Married 18 years Together 20 years S12, S13 Wife EA - 3-2009 Reconciled WAW-9-2009 Reconciled again 2-2010 Bomb- 12/30/2010 Asked for a Divorce 2-8-2011 BITS
well she had lunch with a friend today and said she loves me more than anything in the world but is just scared i will hurt her again and we will fall back into the same ole rut
Then your job is to be a "safe place". The only way to achieve this is by identifying what patterns hurt her before, and learning new strategies not to repeat history.
Do you think you have truly changed as part of this process?
Spellfire aka Mike
"Women do not like controlling men. They respect and are attracted to men who control themselves. They ultimately are repelled by men who allow themselves to be controlled." -S&A
Oh i know what hurt her. Infidelity, controlling and jealous behavior and analyzing and assuming everything she does. Yes i believe i have changed. For some reason and i cannot explain it i for some reason no longer obsessed with her. I love her and care about her but not obsessed to the point i feel like i need to hold on so tight.
