I hesistate to say this...but you might want to check the midlife crisis forum.
When I intially came here I believed I was in a straightforward ( but no less painful) WAS situation. Seems that's not the case for me.
Her ups and downs,the A, the wanting to leave, her age ... Check out my name and initial posts, in there Cadet has posted some resources to help you figure it out.
BITS Me-51, WAS-52 Kids 2 M-26yrs, H.left 2009, 2 more Bomb drops, Reconnection spring 2013 Change is inevitable, personal growth is a choice. Love is a action and choice you make, every day.