Hi Karen

Well looks like things are going along pretty well.....no major backslides.

Read up on the midlife stuff if you can...I don't think anyone but you would be able to tell if that's where H is.

It doesn't seem like it to me...but the same symptoms can be in many situations and it doesn't mean MLC, but the suggestions you get from handling MLC symptoms could help you in your responses to your own sitch..

You may need to take a good hard look at how you are handling things in the work arena. You don't want to put yourself in jeopardy over some personal issues. Try and leave the personal stuff for the time you are at home.

Maybe look at work as a break from personal troubles. Go ahead ! Give yourself that luxury.

No more crying at the office. You are there for a different purpose than to be concentrating on your personal life.
Your work life is yours.
It is not a selfish thing to do ...You CAN have other things in your life besides the relationship with your H.

Look hard at the times when you have allowed yourself to be overcome at work....what were you doing? what were you saying?....who were you talking to?...look at these as triggers to what you were feeling and then got distracted by your feelings...so much that you stopped doing your job! ....and be aware of them...you may not be able to avoid them, but being aware of them can give you a head start on avoiding them...do something else...remember..."do what works"...."DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT"

Kinda like doing a 180 on YOURSELF!! Wouldn't your co-workers be surprized if you suddenley were in charge of yourself ! Just look at it like a place to practice your changes...

GO ON!!!!!!!!!!Be a little selfish. You don't have to share your work time with your H, by thinking about your troubles at work this is what you are doing...you are giving him way too much power here...wouldn't you feel better if it felt like you were in charge of your feelings...not Him!!??

This is "me" time.

This "work" time is to invest in the world other than the one with H.!!

I say you need to really listen to what he is telling you about his birthday......this is not about you this is about him....what does he want?


Now if you truely believe he wants you to do things your way and is just putting on a modest protest about his birthday...then by all means do the things you mentioned......but it sounds to me like you might need to re-evaluate what HE REALLY WANTS out of this birthday......and give him WHAT HE wants.....not the birthday you want to give him....

What are his real concerns...money? Not comfortable with too much attention?

Keep us posted

Do something for you today! It will keep our PMA UP, UP, UP!!
Hugs,
Trish