Ill, Country, Downand, Lost, Denver, 2step and Nine, thanks!
I can't tell you how much I look forward to coming here each night.
Yes, pride is going to play a huge role in this thing and that will be my fault. I always made her feel like she had to depend on me. Now, she wants to be independent. Independent of her parents and independent of old FOBD. Not much I can do about that. But, I would appreciate it if she would quit trying to "sell the salesman" with her B/S about others not playing a role in this thing. My W made this new band of friends about 1 1/2 years ago. Funny, shortly after that was the first time she talked about not being happy and wanting to leave. I just don't buy that this was all coincidence...
Well, not much to report. Day 10 and no contact. She screwed up some paperwork for our health insurance last week while I was away. I got home to an answering machine full of messages from the insurance company. I called on Sunday to discuss. She sent me to voicemail after three rings. I left a message. I emailed. Nothing. I guess two can play at "going dark."
Tonight, I sit here in my half-furnished living room alone. I have taken every picture of her down throughout the house with the exception of one. Next to my TV in my den, I have one sitting there of her and I on our wedding day. She was so beautiful and I was so lucky. If I could only tell that guy what an idiot he was going to become. I don't have the heart to take that one down. I keep putting it in a drawer and taking it back out.
I guess this is where the rubber will meet the road. This is where the "going dark" will either wake her up or put a nail in our coffin. We will see. If she doesn't want to talk to me, I can accept that. But, she doesn't have to be an ass about it. Man, she just lives to punish me. Well, I will just take my whoppin' like a man and continue to wait.
All I can do is get up and get through each day. One of two things will happen. My marriage will end and I will find another or she will come home. Each day I live gets me closer to one of those two conclusions. Either way, I win, right?
Sleep tight, BITS. Tomorrow is another day of living life to the fullest while avoiding the 600lb gorilla that sits in my living room...
BITS never walk alone!!!
FOBD
Me: 39 W: 36 T: 15 yrs M: 9 yrs S: 09/10
So you can get on with your search, baby And I can get on with mine And maybe someday we will find, That it wasn't really wasted time...
