My dilemma is that I don't want to come across like the only reason I didn't put up a fight is because I thought *that* would get her back... I have to let her know that I want her to be happy and that is my only motivation.
I don't want it to seem like I "let" her do this and I really don't know how to put it into words without it coming across like that.
She made comments throughout the process like "you hear about people getting divorced and remarrying..." or "if you love it let it go..."
so I have hope. I believe that she wants to trust me. I just have to figure out how to let her feel free without feeling like I abandoned her lol
Your W and my STXH sound like they are sharing a brain! My H said gave to me the if you love something set it free speech. I've told him that even though I don't want this D, that I will agree to it on paper but never in my heart. That I love him too much to have us be enemies. He's said that he would like to be friends. So if it has to start at the basics again then so be it. Besides, I don't want my old M anyway. I want my new self to shine thru and hopefully start a road to reconnection and then eventually to reconcilation. If the D is going to give our S's the closure they need on this chapter, then we need to do it. Sometimes moving on but not giving up can acutally turn things around. Be the greener grass.
My heart is with you today.
BITS
M: 48, H: 42 Kids: 0 T: 20 yrs M: 16 yrs. (H's 1st, my 2nd) WAS/MLC: 12/7/09-I'm not the wife HE deserved Came home per L: 12/26/09, Left again: 2/6/10 Served: 10/21/10, D FINAL: 6/15/11
