Wow!!! Just wow. The dam broke and that is just an AWESOME thing.
Can I tell you how proud I am of you!! That was a difficult topic to navigate and you did great.
I think that the healing is really going to start now. And that's just what you needed. Please remember how you feel today so you never find yourself in the situation again. My H talked to women like that and it ruined my self confidence in ways I can't even begin to describe. I was the "cool" W who dealt with a lot of that, strip clubs, etc. But in the end, it killed me.
This is so awesome, Bolt. Look at all this work you've done. Be proud, sweetie.
Oh and ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ what grr said. She understood EXACTLY what she was doing!!!
Bolt, very nice. Just hit the cold shower and stay on track.
Yes, she does know what she is doing. And, it works both ways. Some may find what I am about to say strange, but sometimes it is the smallest things that cut like a knife. We have a 1/2 bath between the den and the kitchen. Whenever it would be just the W and I in the house (we have no kids), she would never close the door when urinating. She would just go in, do her business, wash her hands and come out. Many times I walked past the door while doing this and she would always just smile and laugh at me when she would catch me peeking at her as I walked past. It was a stupid game we played and we always laughed about it. A couple of weeks ago while she was here packing up the kitchen, she went to use the bathroom. When she went in, she closed and locked the door behind her. You see, their little moves work both ways. That closed and locked door was a shot at me. In six years, she never once closed that door. That was her little way of saying, "You no longer have access to this..." So, don't ever discredit the little moves whether they are good or bad. Getting dressed in front of you today was a good thing. A very good thing!!
Best of luck, my friend!
BITS never walk alone!
FOBD
Me: 39 W: 36 T: 15 yrs M: 9 yrs S: 09/10
So you can get on with your search, baby And I can get on with mine And maybe someday we will find, That it wasn't really wasted time...
dude! It's so hard NOT to mind read when stuff like that happens either way.
I'm definitely staying off the R talk for a few days now. We're in a very good place and somewhere I feel that we are moving forward - at just the right pace.
She's been hugging me in the halls today - giving me little kisses (I'm still initiating most - but ONE I didn't:) )
Here's a little thing too...
I screwed something up when I went to the grocery store and forgot something. She was joking with me in the kitchen and then headed up the stairs and said, "That's why you make a list" she turned and gave me the nicest sh#t eating grin. I nearly chased her up the stairs.
Starting to feel a little like love...just need to keep stringing a few more days like this.
m 40 w 38 married 15 together 18 d11, d8 bomb 12/19/10 2nd bomb 3/30/11 COMPLETELY DONE
I don't think most husbands realize the whole strip club thing. We think it's ok and it is harmless (to us) but not to our wives. Everyone said how cool my W was to let me go and do that and I totally took advantage of it.
Never again!
m 40 w 38 married 15 together 18 d11, d8 bomb 12/19/10 2nd bomb 3/30/11 COMPLETELY DONE
Boltie, I am sooooooooooooooo glad to hear that. Us wives need to work on communication too. It isn't just you. I really needed to say, you know what? It's not so ok. I used to go with him years ago. We'd have a blast. But when I was pushed out and he was still going, it wasn't so cool anymore.
I don't think most husbands realize the whole strip club thing. We think it's ok and it is harmless (to us) but not to our wives. Everyone said how cool my W was to let me go and do that and I totally took advantage of it.
That is something we all need to take to heart guys! Bolt is dead on with this.
BITS Denver
M 43 X 38 T 13 W moves out of home 11/2010 Roller coaster from hell 2/2011-5/2012 I request divorce 5/2012 W moves home 6/2012 Good time 7/2012 - 1/2015 I leave 3/2016 process of divorce
