He shut his phone off up at work yesterday. So, I guess no communication til he calls me, if he does. I am so tired, but I went to work today and smiled and acted as if I were ok. I am reading The DR book by Michelle...even though we aren't legally married..I thought we eventually would be. We just fight so much lately...I need to start doing something different..so I emailed him and suggested we just start fresh but pledge no drugs for him no booze for me (not a problem for me anymore but it was) and totally fidelity and respect and committment...we'll see how he responds eventually...he has complained I don't trust him and he is pissed that I want to show each other our cell phone bills..he says he trusts me and I should trust him...I wish that I could, but his past behavior always reminds me that he lied to me straight faced....I think he did try over the past year to prove himself to me and I may have pushed him away by not being able to accept that...but is it wise to act as if you trust someone????
Argh! Ex f buddy of his face booked me and said they only did it once and she decided to be friends with him. She said after he met me all he did was talk about me. She says he and suspected ow never got together in front of her..she says she wants him to be happy and that he is happy when things are good with me...but she was good friends a long time ago with suspected ow and so how do I know she is telling the truth? How can all these people that slept together hang out together and act like it is natural? I don't get it...she says she hasn't seen him in almost two years, which is true, but that she has heard he was happy with me from mutual friends...she does not believe he was cheating on me...I do not know what to think...so confused...did I accuse him wrongly? If so, will he ever forgive me for that?
I think it is time to throw in the towel ...obviously folks here believe from the little I have said that he is lying and that he is using me..."because he can" I guess I need to wake up and smell the coffee..
Just because he's lying, is no reason to give up on your marriage. The one has nothing to do with the other.
Call him on his deceit, and deal with it, by drawing (and learning to enforce) appropriate boundaries. But don't give up (unless that's truly what YOU decide you must do) simply because he's lying.
Cheating and lying are as old as the world itself. Marriages can recover from them.
