where in the db book does it say that feelings would not ever be hurt again in a marriage after we have been thru all this crap? NOWHERE sweetie, you still have a marriage to work on and that will be FOR LIFE
Duh moment for me! Yes, I'm still struggling with how to make the transition from crisis to day to day living.
I'm hoping the Keeping Love Alive series will help.
I know the basics, keep doing what works, and experiment and monitor.
I'll keep doing these...seems to be working so far!
And yes, Kitti, he does know about my experiences when I was 12. We've talked about it at length. Unfortunately, when I first told him, I played it off as, "Look how cool I was when I was 12...this is what I did." And he took his cues from my words and said some things that in reality freaked me out and hurt me.
My big betrayal of him, the one secret I don't really want to talk about, is that I went and told everyone in his family and everyone in my family what he said, because I was so freaked out and hurt.
So, he's forgiven me for it, and understands why I did what I did. But, because of my actions, to this day, some of my family refuses to trust him or allow him into their lives.
And that's something that I'll have to live with.
My husband, in talking to me about that whole incident has confessed that he likes to say shocking things. So, he does recognize his responsibility in the situation. However, family means a great deal to me, and it hurts me that an action that I took out of fear and anger means that my husband and some of my family will never be in the same room together.
So, moral of the story kiddos...be careful what you say to friends/family.
