I haven't done everything wrong...

[sparks14]

hey islander another BITS reporting for duty. I see that Denver has been attempting to give you some advice. I also see that one of my fav person also jumped in to give you some advice, I speak of none other than the Gritter.

So I will offer yet another point of view here.

I have read your entire thread in order to accurately have an idea of what is going on.

So lets examine this...........

For all I know she is planning on giving me papers

Let me tell you something about the guessing game. 9 out of 10 times you will be wrong.

But, I am going to tell her that if she doesnt want to work on our marriage, there is no point in being friends.

If that is how YOU feel. If you are doing it to get some kind of reaction out of her then you will get burnt!

tell her i do not want a divorce, i love her and am committed to her and our M and family.

As Mach would say! Don't ask questions you don't want to hear the answers to. It's pointless.

I have a limited amount of time

Which clock are you going by?

I know my W very well

Really? Did you know she was leaving you?

she is attempting to put me in the "friend zone"

I wonder if you walked up to a perfect stranger and just asked her to M you. You did start out as friend right?

Maybe it will give her the opportunity to see what she is doing

The only thing is going to do is validate her reason for leaving.

I believe this is my last chance.

You decide that!

If I wait to long it will not work.

???
You want NOW.
You have no bargaining chip yet you want to negotiate.

I may not know my wife as well as I thought I did,

Wait I am confused........I thought you did know her?

but I know without a doubt what she is trying to do to our relationship.

Again. Look bud the only thing I know is that your head is not in the right place right now. God knows we have all been there and some of us are still there. Stop thinking you know and start to take care of you.

I also know that I I tell her that we will not be freinds if she follows through with the D, it will possibly open her eyes to the full weight of her decision

You know what is going to "open" her eyes? You actions! Not your words or the any half a$$ attempt to read her mind. Become the change you want to see. For the most part women don't leave great guys.

Take some time, look in the mirror and become the great guy you can be.

I know how my W thinks

No comment necessary! I think you get that point!

I feel that I have a little bit more insight into how my W is thinking right now. I am on good terms with her XH.

Wait you got good insight from her XH. Wait........who is he again........Oh yeah XH. He is the X for a reason.

I am not going to chase her

We will revisit this comment.

Then I began to tell her that I loved her and wanted to work on our M.

Sounds like chasing to me!

I am going to stop now because I think you get my point.

DB works not because it is some secret pill.

It works because it is a principal to take care of yourself and heal.

When we first come here we are clouded confused emotionaly devasted. We THINK we know. We know nothing. I hope the 2x4 don't hurt too bad but Denver has been guiding you along.

Yet you want to continue to pave your own path.

Your path has provided you with fruit.

How does it taste so far?

Start to examine your sitch a little closer and read what you have written.

We are here learn from others and although every sitch is different the mechanics are all the same.

He!! I am M to Denver's W and he is M to mine and a half dozen other guys here.

The characters change but the story remains the same.

Wow. That is a breakdown worthy of ESPN. Nice work.