hope, you asked what kind of man does that? I echo 2step...him!
(I kid) I meant ME! Let's see. Taking your wife for granted? CHECK. Leaving behind her feelings - as a matter of fact not even THINKING of her feelings? CHECK. Being selfish and then self righteous? DOUBLE CHECK. Letting the pattern continue because the W is simply nagging? CHECK.
Unfortunately for me, that pattern stopped when the bomb dropped. I was starting to be selfless and all of that but it wasn't until my W actually said, "I don't love you anymore and I want a divorce" did it smack me right in the face.
Hope, maybe you're not exactly to that point but you have to figure out some way to get to him for him to see that this relationship is killing you. I'm no therapist so I'm not exactly sure but what I've seen in my R is that the way the W approaches the husband can be the big thing.
I'm a little at a loss as to any ideas, unfortunately.
I DO wish that we could have all been there to help you
m 40 w 38 married 15 together 18 d11, d8 bomb 12/19/10 2nd bomb 3/30/11 COMPLETELY DONE
