Quote: I guess the problem is I feel the need to keep punishing myself in an attempt to make sure it never happens again.
And if someone else I knew and loved were doing that, I'd tell them, you've obviously learned the lesson, forgive yourself and move on...you are only hurting yourself by hanging onto this.
This just doesn't sit right with me.
Any ideas?
Ya know, I too at first, had struggled internally in feeling I need to "punish" myself for what I had done so I won't repeat my mistakes. What seems to heal my spirit more is to turn my daily mantra "...to make each day better than the one before" into an act of atonement for the prior indiscretions. So if I have a good day at being a better person, then I feel I have given myself a dose of daily forgiveness and I expect I'll be forgiving myself for the rest of my remaining days. So by working to forgive myself each day, I do not fear repeating the errs of my previous ways.
... and since it more likey you'll be reading this in the morning ...
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! ... and may all your Birthday wishes come true!
Jeannine...great point...Welcome sign, huge bold letters, hung up over the door!
KAW...Wow....I never even considered that by focusing on making each day a little better, that of course I would be already doing my best to make sure I didn't repeat past mistakes! Thanks for pointing that out! And for the Birthday Wishes! Happy Tears!
PIB, Something I read yesterday (after big R talk with H... sigh) was about commitment. My H said to me, what if I do this again?
Well, ask yourself "will my children ever starve to death?" Of course, you say NO. And you have no doubts. No doubts at all. Why? Because you are absolutely committed to make that happen... regardless of circumstances, timing, drunkeness, whatever. YOU are COMMITTED. So, whatever it is that is bugging you, be committed to NOT letting it ever have the power and control over you that it has had in the past, and still has today. BE committed. Anyway, just my two cents.
Happy Birthday!
Relax. Appreciate. Be calm. Laugh. Enjoy. Be secure. Be loving. Be loved. Don't personalize. Don't ASSume. Accept. Be grateful.
So by working to forgive myself each day, I do not fear repeating the errs of my previous ways. 
