I continue to be surprised at the willingness of my W to inflict pain and hurt. We were forced together by my D's slumber party last weekend. W insisted on staying in the back room.
Yea, these MLCers are pretty good at that. Outwardly, they are this pillar of strength-a mask-that they wear for everyone to see.
But it's just a mask, and wouldn't surprise me that most of that came from what you wrote below....
Originally Posted By: crushednstuck
The weekend started poorly when she began slamming my tools that I'd been keeping in the laundry room. The house looked great save for some folded laundry on the couch and my D's damp carpet from me shampooing it. Fan blades dusted, floors washed, sheets clean and she raged about the few small things undone. I then asked her to leave and she screamed "you'll never get the house!" and she refused.
One can only give outwardly, what they feel inwardly...
What it must feel like to come to a place that she called, and in most cases still calls, home. Only to find that life has moved on without her in the picture, for the most part.
That your life moved forward , with little regard to where she was...
That's a little bit of a sting to anyone, let alone an MLCer, who is looking for a reason to lash out.
She walked into that house expecting to find it a disaster, with you laying on the couch crying because she was gone. Wanting to be the Messiah. and rescue the party, from your sloth.
That didn't happen, so she became victimized by you. And was actively looking for SOMETHING to make her the heroine.
She found one.....
Because you gave her one...
Don't be too eager to give away your power...
Originally Posted By: crushednstuck
In fact, I was told I was one of the most selfish people she'd ever met.
LMAO........Are you ?
Originally Posted By: crushednstuck
I was also surprised to hear that I was "torturing her". And that I should "let her go". Well I wasn't aware of the former and have been attempting the latter for a year. I guess my unwillingness to call it quits and file is a method of torture.
Though I'm pi**ing her off by trying to validate her complaints and dropping the rope, she still manages to get the hooks in. Apparently I had a chance to get her back from OM but she's now lost all hope. I failed perform well enough during her affair to get her back. It's bizarre, but these things have begun to hurt my feelings again.
Just try and back away from it when it happens...
You have been at this long enough to know the early warning signs of that.
Fisherman....what was that....
Blah , Blah , Blah ??
Picture that coming out of her mouth the next time she speaks like that. Smile ,and say you are sorry she feels that way.
The thing is, that with understanding MLC, you should be prepared for these kinds of interactions....
In time, the only surprise will be which one of her BS lines she will try to pin on you next....
Most of us here have stood in that room and heard those words...
The only thing you can do is change your reaction..
Originally Posted By: crushednstuck
How do I continue to detach when W says she ready to file yet is still monitoring my phone?
You keep doing the things you have been lately..
If she is THAT angry with you, then you are doing something right.
As far as the phone ? Been there. It is part of keeping one eye on you, while keeping the other on whacked out options.
Accept what you are dealing with, weatherproof your feathers, and take a step today bro...
