It is a stroke of luck that Gram died right now. Or maybe she planned it that way. Nothing like a funeral to pull people together and remember the importance of family. i'm not kidding! And you are handling it beautifully by being supportive and letting your wife and MIL come first before your business.
Maybe you could find some time while in NY to visit Niagara Falls, or some other nice weekend getaway with your wife. Something that will replace the memories of nice OM with nice Denver. You don't have to battle OM. You have to win your wife. He will fade from her mind and her heart if you are in both places.
