I continue to be surprised at the willingness of my W to inflict pain and hurt. We were forced together by my D's slumber party last weekend. W insisted on staying in the back room.
The weekend started poorly when she began slamming my tools that I'd been keeping in the laundry room. The house looked great save for some folded laundry on the couch and my D's damp carpet from me shampooing it. Fan blades dusted, floors washed, sheets clean and she raged about the few small things undone. I then asked her to leave and she screamed "you'll never get the house!" and she refused.
The house is underwater. I had been trying to move finances around so that I can take on all household expenses since she has still been paying power and cable. This was met with shreiks of my selfishness. In fact, all the efforts I've made to GAL and extricate myself so she can be more independent have been met the selfishness blast. In fact, I was told I was one of the most selfish people she'd ever met.
I was also surprised to hear that I was "torturing her". And that I should "let her go". Well I wasn't aware of the former and have been attempting the latter for a year. I guess my unwillingness to call it quits and file is a method of torture.
Though I'm pi**ing her off by trying to validate her complaints and dropping the rope, she still manages to get the hooks in. Apparently I had a chance to get her back from OM but she's now lost all hope. I failed perform well enough during her affair to get her back. It's bizarre, but these things have begun to hurt my feelings again.
So she moves out but I can't get rid of her sh*t because she said its time for me to move out so she can come back after a year. I really want to get away from her now because I'm doubting my ability to reconcile even if she wanted to start talking.
Like MHL, my W rarely admitted fault and demanded unqualified apologies from me. It's apparent she will likely not take any responsibility for her part in the failure of our M.
How do I continue to detach when W says she ready to file yet is still monitoring my phone?
