Very good points. When a woman, LD or HD, loses control over "her man"., it sure can be lost over their interest in Sex. After 10 years of SSM, I asked my spouse over dinner if she would consider becoming celebate. She looked at me like I was crazy. To me, it is easier facing the fact that you will not ever have sex with your partner, to have that as a certainty, rather than the daily frustration of guessing if she is receptive, in the mood, the house is clean, the garbage is out, the clothes are put away, the kids are in bed, etc. As you pointed out, it is easier to stay together for the kids, after they are grown, all bets are off. Ever read the newspaper, divorce column, and see how many couples divorce after 20-30 years. I would venture a guess that a SSM is behind a fair share of those. To put myself in a LD woman's point of view, I still have decided that I would come to some sort of compromise in the type, frequency and availability of providing some sort of sex or sexual relief. The payoff would perhaps be a spouse who appreciated my efforts, a spouse who would be less apt to have an affair, less crabby, less moody, less whiney, etc. I think women do not understand how important sex is to the male of the species. It brings us together, and may ultimately also, break us apart.
