[quote=spellfire]Quick question (and anyone can jump in here): So am I being a husband or a friend to my wife? I keep hearing both sides of the coin in this forum. I mean, I agree with you Mike that I should strive to be a husband she desires, but if that role itself is a turn off for my wife right now, what if being a friend is an appropriate way to help her mourn, release, etc?
Husband she desires BUT you need to learn exactly what that entails. Your definition of what it means to be that husband is what got you here in the first place.
If you just work on being her friend, she may just think "this is working out great, he is taking this really well. My departure will be clean and we can stay friends / I can still get the benefits of this R without being married to him".
I am doing everything I can to try to convince you that you can be that husband, but you need to on board with it.
I think we need to go back to basics just for some damage control for now.
Spellfire aka Mike
"Women do not like controlling men. They respect and are attracted to men who control themselves. They ultimately are repelled by men who allow themselves to be controlled." -S&A
