Piecing is almost harder than before...

[Harrier]

Me I don't know yet.I'm not willing to say it's so great. Because I look at my situation differently from a lot of people here.

I'd rather have NOT gone through it because prior to 2010 my marriage was pretty darn awesome. I'm not just saying this out of some willful ignorance. My wife has told me this numerous times.

It's funny about the 180 stuff. I did all that stuff before the D bomb. It kinda bugs me that many men here didn't do one lick of that stuff prior to the D bomb and suddenly they turn in to Mr. Mom. I cooked, I cleaned, I did my share of work with the kids. I felt my W and I were true partners in all respects. My W felt it too.

I know why and when things went to crap. I guess what I'm trying to say is that there are many ways to arrive at this place.

As for the alone time issue. My W and I talk R quiet frequently. I'm sure more frequently than she likes, but she never says I don't want to talk about it. I think it serves a purpose for her. My W is at a place where she is wiling to do the work and it's still tough. I never feel as if my wife has one foot out the door. My main issue is to try to figure out what kind of marriage we will have.

I think that allows me to take more chances with R talk or bringing up my needs.

What helped me was that for the first 6 weeks after the bomb, I gave her tons of space. I still give her space and still need to do more.

Bolt - I think you got it backwards When you are happy, the more likely your W will be happy.