Recovering after a same sex affair

[sparks14]

why are you pushing her so hard?
she asked to only speak about this stuff in therapy but you keep forcing her to deal with it outside of those boundaries

she knows you have the emails
you know she thinks you have more

why would you try giving them to her before an interview when she is probably nervous and when you already know she is in a bad mood?

then you text her several more times?

Sparks...you need to back off and stop being needy
it is unattractive and cloying

you need to let her breathe for real

Thanks for the reality check, Figg. I don't want to seem needy. I guess I am a problem solver by nature (from what I have read, most men are). The emails created a wedge as the therapist said. I only wanted to get rid of them as soon as possible. Maybe the timing was to show my wife that I was not complicating saving them. Maybe it was to show her that I would do anything to prevent them from putting up a wall between us. I don't know.

We both agreed with our therapist that we only talk relationship inside therapy. We have both broken this rule on a few occasions, so please don't think I am the only one pushing those boundaries.

I am trying to get my stuff together. I know you are here to help, but please understand that I am taking the advice if this board and doing my best. Sometimes I do the right thing, and it works out great for us. Sometimes I slip, and it does not put me in the best light. I was told to expect slip up in DR. I just need to learn to lessen the frequency of them.

I do appreciate your words, though. Figg, you are a great influence on my through this struggle. Hearing the ideas and suggestions from the other side of the spectrum has been so beneficial. Thank you.