hello rue, sorry you find yourself here my sitch is similar, without the affair my husband has said there is no turning back and it is my words and actions that brought him to this place he is out of the house now this happened last year and i db'd my butt off and it did work this year, i don't know if anything can, but i'm going to try and so should you keep coming back here you will get help and insight from others just move forward with your life and find the woman he fell in love with let him contact you talk again soon