W "when the he!! did you sacrifice yourself for me? what sacrifices did you make for me?"
M "well...blah blah"
Don't take the bait man!!!! You walked right into that close ambush!
You recovered nicely. Your sense of humor definitely pulls you out of some tight spots! LOL But just because she wants to delve into the torrid past doesn't mean you have to follow her.
A lot of that convo was just painful rehash and has been done many times before. Bringing up the solution based therapy was probably a good thing to slip in there.
But she's not THERE yet. She's not ready to recommit. You ACTIONS not your words will earn that. The running theme with your W is that words are not enough, you talk nice, but when push comes to shove how does she know what you'll do?
Well guess what, you are between a rock and a hard place now. This is when push comes to shove. Now is the time to BE unconditional love. That doesn't mean having no boundaries or letting her walk all over you, but it means acting in a loving way, trying to make her happy, with NO EXPECTATION OF RECIPROCITY.
It will take time to see results, but if you are patient and consistent your actions will break her barriers down.
Michelle - Proud DR Rockette S: 28JUL07, D'd: 29OCT09 http://tinyurl.com/27j9qo2
