The question I have is do I detach? I'm afraid to right now because if I do, I'm afraid I'll become the WAS. I'm getting tired of fighting - feeling so close to just working through it and then have the news come from her.
Bolt, I was afraid of the exact same thing happening while detaching. That's one reason I moved back into our house while my W was away for xmas. I've realized since then that we were actually getting closer while apart, strange as it sounds. The detachment and space was what was drawing us back together.
I've found since then that I still love my W unconditionally. I still have my ups and downs and doubts from time to time, but in my heart and gut I feel things will work out in the end. It looks like I'll be moving back out soon, but in a strange way I think it will help us.
I guess my point is don't worry about detaching. If you do love your W, unconditionally, it will still show through and you will 'win' no matter what the outcome.
Funny, my W said the other day that she was afraid that she'd want me back but I would already have moved on. I suspect your W feels that way inside also (or will soon enough).
Me 43 W 38 M 5 T 7 SD20 S15, S13 with 1st W ILYBNILWY June 2010 Separation/Bomb July 2010 Divorce Feb 8, 2011
