Oh goodness, I just had to close my door. That is the most I've cried in months.
Listen to me, FOBD, your father is very proud of you. He is with you and I believe that with every single fiber of my being. What you are going through right now is not for the weak, that's for sure. I'm convinced that is why so many marriages fail. There are too few people willing to walk the line as you have chosen to do. Plenty of people might be willing to swim across the ocean to save their marriages. Swim across the ocean in shark-infested waters??? Well, most people wouldn't.
You might have been right about why your W was being nice. But, it gave you plenty of an opportunity to show off the man you are becoming to her. She is watching your every single move. She is going to remember that on the lonely nights. There was a lot there that you have to be proud of. And, frankly, after your buddy's brother's death at the same time, no one could have blamed you if you completely lost it. But you didn't. She saw that too. And there are things that she doesn't see that still affect who you are becoming. I mean you come here night after night to take care of a bunch of people who you don't even know. Not only that, but you became their captain. You rallied the troops and gave people a sense of purpose, a sense of being, a sense of belonging. People are proud to call themselves BITS and feel accepted during a time when they are feeling such complete rejection. Your father is proud, my sweet friend, very proud.
I know that it feels like they are not paying attention and that they don't care. But that simply isn't true. You have a wedding to get ready for, sweetheart, and you need to get your head together. You need to get more positive about the things that you have done. You need to make a plan for the weekends. You need to put that house back together so you don't feel so empty. And you need to be ready if she decides this apartment isn't all that it was cracked up to be. You need to run your race.
Oh and you need to get your foot out of my a$$... I saw your post on my thread and will reply shortly but point taken.
I saw your post on my thread and will reply shortly but point taken.