It's hard here today too. Anniversary, married on Monday in 1983. My kids want Dad home badly, as do I.
(((Hugs))) Scylla
BITS
M: 48, H: 42 Kids: 0 T: 20 yrs M: 16 yrs. (H's 1st, my 2nd) WAS/MLC: 12/7/09-I'm not the wife HE deserved Came home per L: 12/26/09, Left again: 2/6/10 Served: 10/21/10, D FINAL: 6/15/11
you have already asked her about a dinner this week
and definately I would bring the baby along
no I love you's
she knows you love her pushing it on her will only make her feel guilty that she can't give you what you want back right now
give her the songbooks from your son
That's a great idea, Figg.
W just picked up S just now. I mentioned plans for the next few nights. Tonight would be my night to have our S. Tomorrow night we have couples therapy, so her brother and his girlfriend baby sit until we get her back later, and then he stays there.
I asked her if she would be willing to come over for to the house for bedtime routine and have a casual dinner tonight. She told me that she did not want to celebrate Valentine's Day with me and that we had talked about having dinner another night. Those were tough words to hear, but I understand. She was planning on having dinner with her brother and watching The Bachelor in her pajamas.
I think I will give her the card with a brief, "no i love you" message and then the songbook from our S. I guess that I should wait until we meet for dinner to give them later this week? I don't want to force them to her on Valentine's when I pick my S up tonight.
Me - 33 W - 33 S - 9 months M - 3 years T - 5.5 years Bomb - 12/14/10 ILYBNILWY PA discovered - 1/18/11 PA began - 3/22/10 Separated
I would even hesitate to give her the songbooks on Valentines day...don't push
I did my best to pick out the least romantic card with the best message. It will be difficult not to give her the card, but I understand, as it does have the words Happy Valentine's Day in it. She told me this morning that she did not want to celebrate Valentine's Day with me today. That is tough. She did agree to have dinner sometime later this week, but I interpret that as "willing to have dinner but no Valentine's intent". In a time, that I just want to be honest with her and show my love, it is often difficult to step away.
I will not give her the songbook today, either. I will wait until a better time later this week or next and give it to her from our S.
Me - 33 W - 33 S - 9 months M - 3 years T - 5.5 years Bomb - 12/14/10 ILYBNILWY PA discovered - 1/18/11 PA began - 3/22/10 Separated
This morning I got a text message from my wife saying U 2. I asked her before she left what that was about and she said she thought she was responding to me wishing her a Happy Valentine's Day, but realized I probably wouldn't do say that to her.
After she went to work she sent me her schedule for the week (she does this so I know when I have to drop off and pick up our kids) and told me she hadn't figured out her new smart phone and it was obviously smarter then her.
I responded by saying thank you for the schedule and Happy Valentine's Day.
She shot back lol and I still say U 2.
I hate this. My last two posts aren't showing up, but we've had a few big hurdles since my original story was posted. I feel like when we have this type of interaction there's hope, only to be followed by more heart ache. Today V-Day, Friday anniversary...I want a fast forward button.
I told her thank you for the schedule...And Happy Valentines Day...
M-30 W-44 STEP DAUGHTER-23 STEP SON-21 SON-12 DAUGHTER-10 TOGETHER-14 YEARS MARRIED-11 YEARS BOMB-1/30/2011 PA DISCOVERED2/5/2011
BITS Me-51, WAS-52 Kids 2 M-26yrs, H.left 2009, 2 more Bomb drops, Reconnection spring 2013 Change is inevitable, personal growth is a choice. Love is a action and choice you make, every day.
Today does hurt. It's a reminder of what I've already lost and how bad it could get.
So, instead, I am choosing to focus on what I have to be thankful for.
As I said on my thread, my almost 2yr old daughter is wearing a special v-day outfit that my mom got her. She is soooo cute today. This morning, she only wanted me to hold her. And, before I left, she asked to give me a hug. And, she blew me a kiss. I asked her to be my valentine and she said "yes"!! How lucky am I?
And, we're all here, able to type on computers and we have each other's support. I don't think any of us are starving to death, we're worried that we DON'T HAVE TO BUY A GIFT today!! Listen, we all have lots to be thankful for. What do you have? Things could be better, but life is GOOOOD!
B.I.T.S
Formerly known as onStepAtATime Me:31 W:31 T:13 yrs M:8 yrs D: 20 months ILYBNILWY: 9/22/10 "I want a separation" 1/05/11
Today does hurt. It's a reminder of what I've already lost and how bad it could get.
So, instead, I am choosing to focus on what I have to be thankful for.
As I said on my thread, my almost 2yr old daughter is wearing a special v-day outfit that my mom got her. She is soooo cute today. This morning, she only wanted me to hold her. And, before I left, she asked to give me a hug. And, she blew me a kiss. I asked her to be my valentine and she said "yes"!! How lucky am I?
And, we're all here, able to type on computers and we have each other's support. I don't think any of us are starving to death, we're worried that we DON'T HAVE TO BUY A GIFT today!! Listen, we all have lots to be thankful for. What do you have? Things could be better, but life is GOOOOD!
Thanks ironman! You know you are right. As hard as today is (especially hearing it from my wife directly this morning), I do have things to be thankful for. I am taking care of my 6 month old S tonight and will get to kiss him to bed. I know he loves me, and I will cherish that.
Me - 33 W - 33 S - 9 months M - 3 years T - 5.5 years Bomb - 12/14/10 ILYBNILWY PA discovered - 1/18/11 PA began - 3/22/10 Separated