Stuck Like "Crazy" Glue

[ScaredinCanada]

First off, thanks 2Step I appreciate your comments.

"Is she right?quote]
Yes she was.

[quote]She didn’t care because you didn’t care. If she is right this would have been a good chance to validate apologize and keep your mouth closed.

Agreed.

[quote]Don’t we all brother. What are you doing to accomplish this?

I'm hitting the gym like the Incredible Hulk, and playing ok. Making plans to go out for my birthday. After that, I'm not really sure how to make "ME" happy?!

Did you expect this convo to really end any other way? Defending yourself when they have one foot out the door is a recipe for disaster. “yes honey. You are right” Too easy but our natural instinct to defend ourselves always gets in the way. You can’t shoot an unarmed man.
quote]

I'm not sure what I expected, I just hate the [censored] that comes out of her mouth sometimes. ALL NEGATIVE! Always looking at things in the worst light possible, but I agree it's not going to help me to be argumentative. To be honest it could have been worse, but I stopped myself and calmed down.

[quote]
Look man it is tough and sometimes words hurt but you need to stay consistent and patient.

Sometimes? That's an understatement. I'm more consistant and patient now than I've ever been since Bomb Day.

BITS
SIC

[ScaredinCanada]

Wow. My experiment of editing quotes went really bad...hope you guys can follow my last post! Sorry!

[ScaredinCanada]

Leaving to head home and hit the gym before getting home! YAY! CANNOT WAIT!

MIL is watching the kids until I get home and W will be at work, hope she's home late so I don't have to see her.

Have a decent weekend everyone!

[ScaredinCanada]

W told me yesterday that she will be going again soon to look at houses, as the builder is going to be releasing them for sale shortly. They are literally a 2 minute walk from our current house. W said she "just wanted me to know".

I said that was fine, but asked that she not make any "final" decisons such as signing a contract or putting down a non-refundable down-payment.

I reverted back a little, and was asking her to make sure this is really what she wanted - to really think about it.

I don't believe she is going to change her mind.

She asked me what I'm planning to do when we sell the house. I told her I hadn't put a lot of thought into it, but that I'd likely plan to rent to try and save some money. She just said "oh is that supposed to make it easier for us to get back together?" I just said no, that I want to get my finances in shape before I look to buy anything.

I went out on Saturday night (didn't tell the W were I was going) and got home late. Just went out to local bar with my BF for a couple beers. W was very agitated in the morning, that I didn't tell her where I was going. She told me, "You need to tell what your doing, you have kids to worry about". I just said, yes I understand but I have a cell phone ad can be reached at any time.

BAH it's V-Day, got some little gifts for the girls...nothing for the W.

BITS
SIC

[ScaredinCanada]

Just wanted to add that lately I've been starting to feel a lot of resentment and anger towards my W.

[grr]

hi
i feel you right now
my husband brought up our future living sitch last nite
he said we need to make a decision in a few weeks
i reverted as well
just slightly
i told him i hope he is happy, because someone needs to be with all of this
he said he is not exactly happy - but is certain it is the right thing to do
happy valentines day to me
blah
but i hope you have a nice one with your girls

[punchy]

I am in the same place as you re the anger and resentment. I believe that this is normal and part of the process we go through in terms of moving on with our lives.

There are many times where I ask myself why am I doing this for someone who I really question whether or not I still even like them never mind love them. The answer is that I am doing this for myself in order to become a better person.

Whether or not our wives want to share their lives with us based on the self improvements that we have made is up to them.

[ScaredinCanada]

Stinks. My W just called, said "I hope your not planning to get me anything for V-Day, because I don't want anything".

I just said, "Ok, that's good to know".

She said, "I don't want flowers or anything.", and I just said, "You don't want flowers from ME, or you don't want flowers?"

She said, "I don't want flowers, and I don't want anything from you"

So I just said, "Did the girls enjoy their gifts?"

She said, "Yes, they were really excited but it surprised me that you did that because it's not like you to be thoughtful."

I just replied, "I know, and I'm realizing that being thoughtful also makes me feel good."

Then I just, "Bye, and I'll see you later". I hung up.

Now I want to cry...

[ScaredinCanada]

hi
i feel you right now
my husband brought up our future living sitch last nite
he said we need to make a decision in a few weeks
i reverted as well
just slightly
i told him i hope he is happy, because someone needs to be with all of this
he said he is not exactly happy - but is certain it is the right thing to do
happy valentines day to me
blah
but i hope you have a nice one with your girls

Ya, my W seems to be a big rush to buy HER house. I think partly because then she'll be locked into it - won't be able to backout.

Just seems so strange how she is so determined to do this...

I'm becoming happy in myself, and starting to really find the PERSON I want to be, but still not getting the attention I WOULD LIKE from my W.

Tonight will be very difficult. It actually won't surprise me if my W tells me she has plans to go out on her own tonight, I'm sure looking at a man who she "hates" and is "annoyed" by but who seems to be making positive changes must be hard to do.

[JustStunned]

SIC, Don't beat yourself up. I wish I could handle my self as well as you did.