I haven't done everything wrong...

[islander]

For the first time in months, I actually laughed and had a good time at work. Then on my way home, I start to feel bad about it. Then W texts me about watching SD tomorrow, and I agree (I ignored several other texts during the day). W then starts texting more and I can tell that she is not happy with the fallout from her decision to leave, but because it is not concerning our kids, so I ignore her and do not respond. And what kills me is that I feel bad for her bc she is so lost, she can't even put two and two together. I want to be there for her, but why. She could end all of our pain right now. If she chooses not to, I will continue to work on me. I know I am 100% better than I was 3 months ago, but I have so far to go. Someboday wrote that if we could see ourselves in the future, we would not hurt so much now. But the hurting now is what makes the future what it is. I know I will never be the same person again, I will be better.