Just checking in to see how you are doing. I've been snowed OUT of my house for a few days. Thanks for the B/D wishes. Have to admit, I don't like seeing them come around anymore.
Inquiring minds want to know, How Ya Doin'
(((HUGS)))
ME: 54 Him: 51 M: 20 years T: 21 years OW/New wife: 36 Sons & Daughters: 7 (ages 24-36) Bomb: March 4, 2010 He Filed: April 28, 2010 I Contested: May 1, 2010 Standing Down: 11/24/10 Divorced : 05/04/2011
TBH, what H's reaction will be to me retaining my own L is foremost on my mind. He should know this coming week. I am not scared, just nervous as he will get vindictive when he finds out I've gone against how he had dictated this D to go. Not looking forward to all this, but I will handle it.
SA - I understand your nervousness about how H will react...but remember you are only protecting yourself and your kids. He is doing what he thinks is best for HIM, so why shouldn't you. Hopefully he will not get vindictive because he can't no longer "control" the situation. They do have the attitude "If you are not with me you are against me". But your lawyer seems to think that you will come out OK in this, so take some comfort in that.
(((hugs)))
M53 H54 D17 M33Y T38Y Bomb OW 09/09 OUT 10/09 BACK 11/09 OUT 01/10 WANTS TO R 04/10 BACK with OW 05/10 Wants to Reconcile 05/11 I said NO
Thank you Mila for your support. It is much appreciated.
Brook, thank you for your support and kind words. I know your advice comes from experience, and I am grateful to you for paying it forward.
Once H finds out about my L and I receive his spew for going against his 'wishes', he will then do his vindictive best to punish me. When I find out what that is I will no longer be nervous and can get down to the business of getting divorced. It is the anticipation for me that is the worst. I am trying to not let it 'get to me'.
I am not mind reading. I lived with this man for 27 years. I have seen how he is to people that he believes have crossed him.
My conviction was to be fair in this, and it still is. Where H will have a problem is what my state deems fair and what H thinks is fair are two different things. This will be H's problem to deal with, not mine.
Get ready to get angry. As said above^^^^^, and what I'm seeing, their idea of fair is not even in Widipedia. The anger? If you are anything like me, it will be hard to keep your mouth shut when they say certain things. Rewriting history and all.
Something else? He started this, and SURPRISE! the state you live in makes the rules. If he is really that vengeful when crossed, go him one further and get an order of protection. ((hugs))
ME: 54 Him: 51 M: 20 years T: 21 years OW/New wife: 36 Sons & Daughters: 7 (ages 24-36) Bomb: March 4, 2010 He Filed: April 28, 2010 I Contested: May 1, 2010 Standing Down: 11/24/10 Divorced : 05/04/2011
