Really hard time.... III

[what next?]

What should be my "as if" mindset for this conversation?

[what next?]

Just got my divorce papers in he mail... All that I have left to do now is sign it and have it notarized.

Today is a bad day.

[DumpedforMIL]

sorry to hear that.

bad day? think of it as a new beginning.

[what next?]

I'm trying to... but it's hard to think rationally when your mind is trying to go into shock lol

[DumpedforMIL]

i really don't want to say this .. but be glad you didn't have kids.

i hate feeding that line to others because it doesn't matter. two people are still hurt in the end.

kids would have made it more tough. you'd never get her out of your life.

[Redo]

Believe me i can attest to that. We have a 3 year old. It breaks my heart to know that my time with my daughter is going to be rationed and i'll miss out all the little things in her life.

As to your part of signing waiver-of-signature, read through the form before getting it notarized and mailing it back. Make sure you are not signing off on any clauses that you should not be.

[what next?]

Well, I don't want her out of my life. I'm still hopeful and I knew that this day was coming soon. It really doesn't change my goals with our marriage but it still hurts.

And I am more grateful than I can put into words that I haven't had to experience this with children involved. I can't imagine how people make it through that with a shred of sanity left.

[2stepboogie]

I am not even a little ready to receive those papers but I have to prepare as if they are coming. If you promised to sign them then sign them. What I did was sign and sent them back to my W instead of the attorney. I would like for her to actually be the one to turn them in. I know it prob won’t make a bit of difference but it made me feel better.

I think to call her tonight to let her know that you got those things done is not a bad idea. It can’t hurt at this point. Call her up keep it simple light and fun, smile while you talk to her and ask her how she is doing. Don’t sound sappy or sad just sound content. After a few minutes let her know it was nice talking to her and you will be around if she would ever like to talk to you. That’s it.

It’s like throwing a pebble in a lake but even the smallest stones have a ripple effect

[Redo]

What I did was sign and sent them back to my W instead of the attorney. I would like for her to actually be the one to turn them in. I know it prob won’t make a bit of difference but it made me feel better.

Oh man, wish i had done what you did 2Step. I mailed it to her A. Yea, i think it would be a much better idea to mail it back to the spouse. They wanted the D so let them mail that letter back to their A.

[what next?]

What should be my "as if" strategy? I think that I'm going to act as if these papers are the key to burning the bad memories and preserving the good ones. They will represent our chance to start over knowing everything that I know now but didn't before. These papers are my chance to be the best husband that I can be with no baggage or regrets. I'm going to act as if I am grateful to have experienced this growth because I am.

OK... I feel better now. Lol.