The Moment of Clarity

[Denver_2010]

Thanks Mach, 2Step and Scylia. I know, I know... I'm focusing way too much on the 'what ifs'.

Unfortunately, I'm trained to do this. I'm a criminal defense attorney and when I have a big trial, I HAVE to be prepared for EVERY negative piece of evidence that may come up, EVERY surprise piece of testimony that may come out of a witnesses mouth, and EVERY negative ruling that a judge may make during the trial. I sometimes prepare for months for all of these 'what ifs'. If I don't, my client usually goes to prison for a very long time.

This is what I am doing. Yes, I'm driving myself nuts here. Hopefully, just like do when I'm doing one of these trials that I'm talking about, I become cool and collected, and well spoken, when the time comes.

I'm using my time wisely this afternoon. Just reviewing some stuff that I have learned since coming here.

BITS
Denver

[2stepboogie]

I am assuming he is handsome hahahahahahha

Look man I want you to succeed so I hope you don't take offense to my 2x4.

Mach said it best

"Seek first to understand and then to be understood"

[Denver_2010]

Thank you grr so much. You are such a calming voice here. I needed that.

And this is what I would tell you if you were meeting your H tonite...

"i know the feeling all to well and really it is at these times when we think the worst
you need to start thinking positive right now
i like what 2step said
you ARE all those things (pretty, intelligent, compassionate)
BE all of those things tonight

no matter what goes down, remember, you are in this for the long haul
and what goes down, might just be beautiful
try to put yourself in a good place

remember that we are basically animals and can smell desperation
you are not desperate
you are funny, cute and give great advice"

It is great advice.

BITS
Denver

[Denver_2010]

No 2Step! Not at all man! I'm here for all sorts of advice, encouragement AND 2x4s!

I'm not in as bad of a place as I may sound. Yes, I'm nervous, anxious, and, yes, somewhat fearful of my W right now ... LOL (She weighs about half as much as I do and she scares the living hell out of me right now... hilarious)...

But I'm usually pretty decent to acting under pressure when the time comes. I will be okay tonight.

I just need to talk it out today and review some of the things that I've learned about DB and about myself.

BITS
Denver

[Denver_2010]

OH! And damn straight I'm handsome!! LOL...

[Jack_Three_Beans]

Tonight is going to GOOD Denver.

One way or the other.

Denver is going to be good.

I'm not going to tell you not to be nervous, first off, you're going to be unless you don't want to be.

What's going to happen tonight?

Will it be good, will it be bad? Will it be good, will it be bad?


You're going to find out tonight.

I am where I am today, because of the good AND the bad things. I cannot pin point which ones were vital to my marriage, because they all were.

Good and bad things will happen to you, or involve you. Tonight? Good or bad, its going to be how you handle yourself.

If things go good? That's a no brainer, right? Slow steady, nice, banter, the guy its EASY to be.

If things go bad? Who is she going to see Denver? Is she going to be relieved at or questioning whatever she wants to talk to you about?

No sunshine up your skirt, tonight is an unknown. How you react...is the one thing you should know going in.

Hope for the best, and you know the rest of the saying.

This is likely, you're 'middle'

Which by the way, is an awesome song.

"Hey, don't write yourself off yet
It's only in your head you feel left out or looked down on
Just do your best, do everything you can
And don't you worry what the bitter hearts are gonna say"

If I thought I was at the end, Denver? I'd be a blind fool.

I'm still in the middle too. : ) Everyday, I try and show her the reason she is with me.

[grr]

and denver.....make sure you look hot!

[dixiegal]

Denver,

I'm lifting you up friend in prayer. You can do this!!! Just like when you walk into court. You are prepared, right? So, take time after your done getting ready this evening.

Sit down, go over the high points of DBing. Think carefully about what you DONT want to say or mistakes you have made in the past. Then give your self the time to prepare once more. Arrive at the location a little before her. Park away a bit....again go over your "notes". Then move your car closer in. Take a deep breath, pray and walk in that joint and show her the new Denver!!!

I'm praying for GOD to lift you BOTHup. For him to guard your heart/mind from hurts/pain. I'm praying that GOD will soften her heart. That he will be with yall tonight.....

(Tonight I had looked forward to having dinner w/ H....he never called...)

So, look at this a success regardless...she is meeting you. Don't worry about the small stuff! (Funny that I of all folks say that..) You have no idea what she is going to say. But, you do know how you will respond and act. Right!?! She can't take that from you...You are in control of you.

We are all sending you good thoughts!!!

Blessings my friend,

Dixie

[Truegritter]

How you react...is the one thing you should know going in.

And if you know THAT you cannot fail.

No matter what she does or says.

[Jack_Three_Beans]

Denver,

You have an amazing support group here with your BITS and SITS.

You guys and gals are going to be the wise ones people turn too and it is great to see.

I want to leave you with something, something you should do for yourself, and your BITS and SITS I hope will follow suit.

Find an inspiration.

I don't mean an artsy one, or something to inspire you toward enlightenment or the divine.

I mean insipration when you are broken, spitting blood, teeeth clentched, and you are inspired to ask, "Is that ALL you got?"

Something that makes you feel 500 foot tall and invulnerable.

I'll leave you with a few of mine, and a suggestion to follow.

Invictus

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.

William Ernest Henley

And two songs:

With todays modern tech, you can and I hope you will check them out.

All American Rejects - Move Along

Mudvayne - Not Falling

Get rid of the "I miss you" songs.
The inspiration song you choose, should be about you, not about her. Your decision to spit out teeth and come up swinging.

The suggestion. Find that song, listen to it on the ride over...not to light you up, not to get your back up...but to get to 500 foot tall.