Anyways, after not contacting her in over 24hrs, I had to tell her about a note from daycare I got when I picked up our daughter today. It was about a Valentine's Day party of course!
Anyways, I told her about it and let her know I picked up some cookies for it. As long as I am friendly, she has been very friendly through all of this as well. We also need to bring in a family picture!!! I told her of one I had I could bring and she thought that was a good idea.
It is tough have these pleasant exchanges in some ways. It can make me feel like everything is normal for a second, and then that just amplifies the reality of the situation when you remember what is going on.
Any ways, I thought I would also post a reply I made on another forum. I think it has some information in it that could be useful in understanding our relationship.
"I have become aware of my problems and I know I am also responsible for the situation we are in. I drank too much, I was controlling, I didn't give her enough attention, we didn't do a lot of fun things togeter, etc. I also was at times verbally abusive. I take full responsibilty for my part, and I am working on improving myself in all of these areas.
She was a very loving wife until the last year or so. She was not a hurtful person. One of the problems in our relationship is she did not stand up for herself. She let me dominate and just bottled up her frustration.
I think of myself of somewhat of an oddity. I am social with friends, but do not really enjoy meeting new people. I can be a negative person. I have a temper.
I think I find I am attracted to people who have a greater deal of compasion than myself, and my wife had this. I feel like now she has done a 180. I think she always had to be the piece keeper. Always had to be the "nice" one, now she is doing the complete opposite."
BITS
Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.
