Piecing is almost harder than before...

[Bolt]

xyz - just catching up with your sitch and it sounds awfully familiar.

W and I are back on track but the affection just isn't where "I" want it to be. It confounds me as well and it grates on me.

I often have those same feelings that you have, wondering if this is all going to be worth it.

Then I hear JTB who's gone through this as it being normal. That helps tremendously. Doesn't make it easier but at least I know I'm on the right path.

It's funny because this part of the process IS harder. It's not as black and white. I find myself backsliding into the needy/begging mode. I know that if I do that, it will push her away and I'll have to start all over.

My only advice is to look for those changes. I know you want things and want them now but also look to see how things were just a month ago? Just a week ago?

That's what keeps me positive.

For instance - my W just TWO weeks ago was ready to leave me. I mean, move across country. She even flew across country to find a job, find a place, find a new life.

Well, she did find a job, a place and a new life. The good news was the new life was with me.

BUT what do I do? We haven't ML in 2 months (the longest in 17 years) and I'm complaining that I can't get no "lovin". Seriously? TWO WEEKS ago, I was going to be alone and she wanted nothing to do with me.

I have to look at what she IS giving me right now. She consistently rolls over and spoons/cuddles me. Almost always gives a kiss bye before work. Almost always touches me when she passes me in the kitchen. I have to take that and see what I didn't have just TWO weeks ago.

(sorry for the capitalization but I like to EMPHASIZE words:))