just so sad

[abbey1989]

Hi,
We've been married 22 years with two nearly grown children. We run a business together. I also recently re-entered the workforce and have gone back to school to finish my degree.

I have had suspicions over the last 2 year that H has been having an affair with a former client. She as divorced about that time.

Last Thursday, H accidentally called me from a number that I didn't recognize. He called numerous times before I answered and then was obviously taken aback that it was ME that answered (he had just previously called me on his regular cell phone). He hung up...and I called him back on that number a few times and he didn't answer. Trying to get his story straight I imagine. He finally called a few minutes later from his real cell phone. He said he was having issues with his phone and had to borrow one of his worker's phones to call me. OK...whatever. I wanted to believe that story but something told me he was lying. I didn't check my voicemail all weekend, but Monday morning I was very surprised to find out that he had left a message for who I believe is the OW...ON MY CELL PHONE. Nothing graphic, but hurtful. He said "Hey Babe (he never calls me that) I'm here at the college parked near the cafeteria. " So I guess he didn't really borrow someone's phone from the jobsite if he was at the college. I asked him about it and he just said that he was there to meet an architect. I know he was there to see OW who works there. He asked well did I leave that message the day you were at school? (I go to the SAME school where she works). No it wasn't the same day.

I am so tired, hurt and sad. Then I cry and can't sleep or eat. Why would he do this to us? Why would he lie about it? Why can't he come clean?

I believe they have been dating for at least 2 years, so it must be serious. Where does that leave me? We never fight, we have a nice life. I am so sad and mad I could scream. But I don't want to seriously confront for fear it will end. I am wondering if he is just waiting until my daughter graduates from HS to make a move? I don't know. Any advice is much appreciated. Thanks....