please help on what i need to do.

[Redo]

LIS,

My W and I are trying to work out this D in a civilized manner. She has an A and I am going without one. We talked over the weekend about the asset allocation. Even though she's getting all of our liquid assets, i am not gonna fight on that. That's fine by me. The goal being that once we agree on all the things, then her A will draw up a new petition and both will sign off on it. No trial no mediation. Some kind of speed divorce i guess. That's how W wants and i had no intention of taking this to the court. I felt that i could reason with my W i've been married for 11 years, especially when we both know that we need to be friends at-least. I don't want my daughter to ever feel that her parents duked it out in courts.

Now in the divorce petition that my W filed, there's a clause that says that i need to see a counselor regularly if i need to get my daughter over to my place. I am not sure how this gonna be enforced. My wife tells me that she has no intention of getting a social worker monitoring this. I guess she wants access to the therapist so she can inquire about my progress. Now if i chose to give her sole custody of our daughter then she said that there won't be any therapist clause in the petition.

I do have a history of taking decisions that would please my W. Looks like even in divorce, my heart keeps telling me to do things to please her.

For myself, yup I am already going to meetup groups and other help groups and am also planning to go a good counselor. One part of me tells me that i need to do that for myself. The other says that if i do see the counselor and give my wife the access to my counselor, then she might notice that I am working on bettering myself and might decide to give another try on the M. I know that i am going back to my old ways on pleasing my wife. I guess that's gotta be my 180: Do things for self, not for others...

would love your feedback.