He has been here two days now. I got my book in the mail. He has slept a great portion of that two days. He has not tried to initiate sex. He is broke, waiting for a check so he can buy plane ticket to work. He flies to one city and then is flown from there for free to work. This is true. Is he here because he has nowhere else to go and nothing else to do as he is broke? I don't know. It is so hard. I am keeping my mouth shut, but it is hard. I want to scream at him. I looked in his phone shortly after he got here when he was sleeping and there was a Dawn in there that was not there before...then she was deleted the next day. His old drug buddy Candace is back in the phone...she supposedly has a man and does have a new baby, but is a druggie. Good Lord, I don't know what to do...is it worth it? Can I believe he will ever stay clean? I think he did for a long while, with me...but sleeping is a sign of meth withdrawal and he is sleeping a lot...what to do???? He has to go to work for two weeks on Thursday morning..I guess I will just try to be nice til then and see how it goes, but I AM not liking this. I hate it when he's gone...and am starting to hate it when he's here...
