Stuck Like "Crazy" Glue

[ScaredinCanada]

Update:

I get home from work, and things are good. Small talk, discuss interview at my D5's school (she's doing amazing!) and some other little things.

My W goes upstairs to do a load of laundry and I decide that this is the point that I'll change my tune.

I said W, I've been thinking. The next time you are going to look at houses please let me know as I'd like to come. I think it's important for me to take an active role as it's important to me where the girls are living.

Her response "I don't think you could handle that". So I said, yes I thought you might say that. Well the reality is that I want you to be happy, and I obviously am concerned about where the girls are going to be living. So she says "Ok".

I go to walk back down stairs and she calls my name. So I just said "Yes?"

She starts to go into again how angry she is at me, for the way I let my mother treat me. She believes that 70-80% of the problem is due to my mother and my poor handling of the situation. She says that she doesn't know if she can ever forgive me, that feels like so many years have been wasted. She doesn't want to waste anymore of her life.

All the time she seems to be really struggling with what she's saying.

She was going out tonight with girls from work and she asked me to give her a ride. The R talk continued in the car, saying she just doesn't know if our sitch is fixable and that she doesn't think she's a bad person for wanting out of the R. I agree completely, and said for once I truly understand what she is sayng and the mistakes I've made.

I tell her to have fun, but be careful. She responds, "I'll try." Sounding all depressed.

Man, she is different day to day this is unreal. Yesterday I thought my M was doomed...now today I'm not sure.

I can really see the doubt in her, but at the same time she still talks about getting her own house.

I can see this is going to take a loooooong time.

BITS
SIC