1. I am glad that you went to see the game. I know that was a tough decision, but you made the right one.
2. Contradictory statements??? Well, maybe it's just me, but I would be thrilled by those. If she kept insisting it was over and not giving you a glimmer of hope, then I would be more concerned. That is not what's happening. It's time for you to take a walk over to the thread showing people who reconciled. Those people are together and were hearing the same things you are.
3. "Trying to be nice." Ugh, I would love to just tell her not to do you any favors. BUT, this is actually not a bad statement either. See, it's pride-saving time. She is turning a corner, but she's got her pride to keep in doing it. I have a feeling as you move closer she's going to continue making statements like this... like she's doing you a favor. Ignore it. AND DO NOT LET YOUR PRIDE DO THE TALKING. If you do, that door will slam faster than you can blink an eye.
4. Ummm... she's confused and torn because her fantasy is falling to pieces at your feet. Meaning, she felt that she would leave and everything would be fine and dandy. Whatever misery she was going through at home would suddenly evaporate if she left. Well, the misery is probably still there, might even be worse and she hasn't a clue what to do with that. Why we believe that our spouses are any less confused than us, I don't know. They are probably more confused. We are learning to have a plan. We have been given a book with the steps clearly laid out. We are talking to people on a daily basis who help us refine our plans. What are our spouses doing??? They are floating in the wind with little to no anchor.
5.If you are smart, you'd do anything to keep me. But that's just my opinion. " - Now this statement is the most telling of them all. She is telling you something here. If she was trying to get away, she would NEVER EVER EVER EVER make a statement like this. She would be running in another direction and would not be doing anything to spur on behavior that is consider pursuing. They hate pursuing when they make the decision to leave. Well, that doesn't appear to be the case here exactly. She's daring you to come after her with this statement. Very, very interesting.
6. Forget about the OM. He does not figure into this equation right now. You have got to do anything to get this out of your mind. I'm pretty convinced that was more fantasy than anything else. I have a feeling that was more of a safety net after she left than something that had truly developed.
Denver, you're doing awesome. Play it smart. Get on phone with DB coach. I am so cheering for you! I am also praying for you. Hang tough.
