W in long PA with another woman. I'm devastated.

[sparks14]

I had a great 24 hours with my 5 month old S. Since my last post, we spent most of the day playing, feeding, and napping. I strapped on the Baby Bjorn and walked around the neighborhood with him facing out (straight out of the movie The Hangover if you have seen it).

I dropped my S back off with the W at her brother's apartment on my way to church. I cannot believe how hard that was. I didn't want to let him go. I didn't want to leave my W either.

I went to church, so I had a chance to pray for strength and guidance. I really needed that.

I thought I was going to be fine until I drove up to the empty house, and it has hit me all over again.

I tried calling the five members of my family just to talk. No answer from any of them. Really hurt right now.

Why did she do this to me? I am crushed inside!