I started rereading DB the second he walked out - LOL!!!
I think that he's confused too. He really was struggling with walking out the door, but I couldn't figure out whether it was from guilt or an internal struggle with really wanting to be out of here. That's when I confronted him and told him that it was best for right now and gave him the speech I did above.
I have to answer the phone right now because he knows I am home. He knows that I have one of my killer migraines so he knows I can't go anywhere. Last time he took off for 4 days on his trip, I didn't answer all the phone calls and the texts and that's when things really took a turn for the worse. I don't understand why, but they did. During the week, it's definitely easier because I am gone a lot to the gym, so he doesn't get so insulted.
So... he called again a little while ago. He was letting me know that he was going to friend's house for SB. I told him that was great and he should have a great time. Then he texted me to remind me of an interview that I really wanted to see that was on. I was sleeping so it took awhile to answer that. Then I finally texted back. Then he called again. Asked how I was feeling and I said I wasn't much better, but I was still smiling. Then he said to call if I needed anything. I said hopefully you'll be too drunk to do anything for me because you are having a great time. Then he said he could turn around and come home right now. I said absolutely not that I promised I was fine.
Ok... me confused? Definitely! Again, not sure if this is guilt or what. But I am going to need to play this Bolt's way right now. I support whatever he wants but I'm always there to be his friend. Last time the distance didn't work. Not to mention that his chief complaint about the marital breakdown was my distance. (I am very comfortable with being alone and doing my own thing).
Monday morning first thing... I'm on the phone with a DB coach because I gotta tell you I'm sort of stumped.
Dixie, girl, are you still doing good?? I just have a big smile on my face because of you. Do you know how proud I am??? You are awesome!!!!
