Having a hard time... II

[MrBond]

For one thing, you have no idea what DBing is all about. It's about doing what works to get a positive result. You DON'T KNOW what your W is going or not going to do. The most important thing is for you to keep your head during all interactions with her.

The DBing principles of not pursuing, etc. are to be done in the initial stages to cool things off and not make situations so intense. Once things are settled down, you go and start some friendly communication while you're re-building your self-esteem.

Your LRT and "going dark" has been for one reason only...to run away. As a matter of fact, there were several windows of opportunity that were available to communicate, yet you kept talking yourself out of it.

This has nothing to do with the D or anything. She's your W it's natural that you would just ask her how she's doing. You keep saying that you've changed, yet how can she see your changes, etc. She can't see your changes because you haven't manned up and talked to her so she can "see" the changes. Right now she probably thinks things are the same as when you left.

Let me put it to you this way. If you don't start planting the seeds of a R back into your W, someone else will.