Originally Posted By: Pickle
Whatever she decides, I'm at a peaceful place, I've gotten there (I think). Is that what you were talking about?


There is a certain peace in letting go of things you can't control...

You can't control what she wants or her choices.

You only control how you let them affect YOU.

And in that process you discover who YOU really are.

As long as you know that and what you want and believe in

Then the rest is just the will to make it happen for you.

Letting her stay in your home while commiting adultery is YOUR choice.

How does that align with what you believe. Your son will know the truth one day. Is that what you want to teach him?

I am not trying to convince you one way or the other Pickle but you can't control his mother's choices and you never will.

Her choices have consequences and your job is not to save your W from those consequences.

Her R with your son is hers to destroy. It is not yours to repair either.

Your job is not to damage it by your own hand.

But not to repair it.

Will it traumatize him. Yes. Probably.

What can you do?

Be the best father to him you can.

Pickle I believe you have taken a big step in understanding that you must let your W choose and somehow bring yourself to a peaceful place about it.

The next step? Finding Pickle again. Do that for you and your family.

They need a man who knows who he is and can be there for them.

Your words sound to me more like a beaten man.

Don't confuse letting go with losing.

What in this sitiuation do you control?

How will you choose for those things? For YOU?

My goal is to some day be the person my dog thinks I am