I have done everything wrong....

[Denver_2010]

"at what point should I respond?" That's the million dollar question. I can't really answer that. I just know that it isn't yet.

Right now, she is with OM. Right now, she is feeling A LOT of guilt. Right now, she does not want to be M'd to you.

Responding will only validate what is going on with her RIGHT NOW.

She needs time away from hearing your voice and your words. Hopefully, this time away will allow her to begin to feel other emotions that are more healthy for your M. Emotions related to what she is giving up, missing you, remembering good aspects of her M to you, etc. This is one of the main reasons for going dark. The other being that of giving yourself a chance to become stronger, more focused, and emotionally balanced. You have just been round housed punched by Mike Tyson and knocked silly... you need the darkness so that you can come to your senses. So that you can act and react in a rational way.

I'd really consider staying dark for a good 2 or 3 weeks. Then reassess where you are at.

BITS
Denver