Well in that regard you are up on me. My MIL is very sick has been for yrs never really liked the idea of W being with me for several reasons.
1. I was M before and had a daughter and W was her youngest D. I completely understood this.
2. Moved D to Jersey away from her.
SIL
Never really liked the idea of having to be the only person taking care of MIL so for a few years she was not happy about the move either. That is the extent of my W's family. A few years ago MIL and SIL were trying to talk D into leaving me and moving back to OK so she can be closer, it got so bad that my W told them that if they were going to call only to complain about me they should save their minutes and not call her.
They have never accepted the fact that we moved to Jersey and I took the brunt of that. I would argue that they had selfish love. I was raised completely different my happiness was my parent’s happiness. If that meant living in Alaska while they lived in FL they were fine with that. Anytime I talk to my dad who is 90 and lives in FL everything is perfect in his life nothing is wrong. Then I find out through family he is sick or he fell but he never mentions it to me so that I don't worry.
But when W would talk to mother or sister it was "I'm so sick" "I don't understand why you have to live so far" "Why can't you find work closer to home" "It's not fair that I do everything for mom" "You shouldn't be raising someone else D" this crap went on for years.
After awhile it became a source of constant irritation for me. My family always took my W as a daughter, in the immediate family there is about 20 members and they loved W. In my W's family there is mom and sister and that’s it. They live in a town pop 8k where you can't blink without the entire town knowing about it.
I don't know if you see what I'm getting at here; my uphill battle is HUGE!
