To answer your question, I am going dark because we have been having quite a bit of contact lately and it is still hard. I am going dark to give myself a break from this mess. As time progresses, I find myself actually OK with the periods where we don't talk to each other for a couple of days. When we talk, I get my hopes up. Frankly, now, when I don't hear from her for awhile, I have some time to think and concentrate on myself.
Maybe leave it at that...
Originally Posted By: FellOnBlackDays
And, I just don't seem to get much from our conversations. Yes, we do have nice conversations, but they always turn to logistics about the move or something she needs. If she can't just talk to me like I still matter for once instead of like a concierge, I don't want to talk to her at all. After 15 years, I would think I deserve better than that. But, in her mind right now, apparently I don't. So, I don't desire the calls as much as I once did. If she needs something, she can pick up the G D'ed phone and call me. I don't have time to sit around waiting for her next demand or request. "Sweetheart, you left and I don't owe you anything." I guess that just about covers it.
Because this doesn't shine you in a very good light...
It's okay to feel this way, in fact you need to feel this way....
But it needs to be processed emotionally, and in a healthy way.
Use that anger as a shield to protect yourself against her craziness right now.
If you don't process that, you will find you are using that as a sword instead..
As far as V-day....
I'll say it first and save some of the shock for those who choose to give their wayward spouse a gift or some sappy card to commemorate the day......
It's a Hallmark Holiday, made up to sell cards and candy once a year......
