You are right, Kim, I need to learn how not to freak out. I can't make H be trustworthy, I have to freely give him my trust again. Logically, I know I can't affect what he will do, so it's pointless to get wrapped up in it. If he wants to hurt me again, that's his choice, and I certainly can't stop him. All I can do is be the best me I can be.
None the less, I am a natural worrier - the glass half's empty kind of person, so I really have to look to not try and avoid the negatives.
Wishing, I'm going back to school for fun. I decided to pick up another degree in accounting. Since I also obsess about being destitute some day, I figured another hard skill would be worthwhile. Also, I am going to a local private business school, and they haven't got the widest choices! Where my H works is affiliated with that school, so family members get free tuition. Can't beat the cost! H has not yet finished his degree, so I have been poking at him gently to give it a try. They do alot on line, so it's pretty easy to work into a busy schedule.
I wish my son would take it as an example! He is not academically motivated - but smart as a whip! Again, I have to keep my expectations for him in line, and not push too hard there either.
