Me - 39 yrs old Wife - 39 yrs old Married - 18 years Together - almost 21 year Kids - son age 13/ daughter age 10 Bomb Dropped in May 2010 Seperating - June 2011, after school lets out
Well this morning I woke up and she had ended up sleeping on the couch all night. Whatever, that left the whole bed for me to roll around in. LMAO
But seriously, it justs seems like more and more hits keep coming. I am really trying hard to stay focused but darnit, sometimes new words just hit the heart and sting so badly.
I hate this feeling of not knowing if she even cares that I am trying to change. I mean she plays word games with my wanting to be a better person. I mean does it truly matter if I am changing who I am because I want to be with her? Either way I am working on being a better person..
Good Grief
Me - 39 yrs old Wife - 39 yrs old Married - 18 years Together - almost 21 year Kids - son age 13/ daughter age 10 Bomb Dropped in May 2010 Seperating - June 2011, after school lets out
Well wife never came to bed last night... Second night in the last 4 nights she "fell sleep" on the couch! What does this mean?
Me - 39 yrs old Wife - 39 yrs old Married - 18 years Together - almost 21 year Kids - son age 13/ daughter age 10 Bomb Dropped in May 2010 Seperating - June 2011, after school lets out
Well, today is hard for me, just trying to stay focused is getting difficult. I just need some positve words from the wife.
This is so hard to deal with.
Me - 39 yrs old Wife - 39 yrs old Married - 18 years Together - almost 21 year Kids - son age 13/ daughter age 10 Bomb Dropped in May 2010 Seperating - June 2011, after school lets out
My goal is to go home and sleep avoidance seems to be my only option today because I am very down right now.
Me - 39 yrs old Wife - 39 yrs old Married - 18 years Together - almost 21 year Kids - son age 13/ daughter age 10 Bomb Dropped in May 2010 Seperating - June 2011, after school lets out
If you couldn't look to your W for positive feel-good words, where would you look? I'm sure it is very difficult to stay focused when you feel it's without her help, but that's how it is with a WAS.
What could you do for yourself that would lift your spirits today?
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
S2D - I go back to the MC and what W said - She can see changes but is afraid to get burned again, right?
Well, right now she's seeing if you indeed ARE changed. This is the HARDEST part because you feel like you've changed and can do it when she's around but what about when she isn't on the same page as you? THAT'S the hard part.
THAT'S when you really need to show that you've changed. I do like that you are coming here to vent. Do NOT vent to her like, "Why did you sleep on the couch again?" That would set you back so I'm glad you aren't doing that.
But this is where you stay strong. Hey, she's in the same house as you. Keep doing the detachment thingy and DEFINITELY GAL.
Like I said, I go back to the counseling. Look at what she said and take it to heart. Keep working!!!
m 40 w 38 married 15 together 18 d11, d8 bomb 12/19/10 2nd bomb 3/30/11 COMPLETELY DONE
Bolt, I am feeling your words and thank yo for bringing back to light things she has said in the last counseling. I tend to forget things like that and those are things I need to remember. You rock. Off too bed I go and yes, I made it thru the evening without relationship talk.
Me - 39 yrs old Wife - 39 yrs old Married - 18 years Together - almost 21 year Kids - son age 13/ daughter age 10 Bomb Dropped in May 2010 Seperating - June 2011, after school lets out
good for you! by the way, my W would do that sometimes too - sleep on the couch. She even told me on a few occasions that it had nothing to do with me. She just felt like sleeping downstairs. Don't read into anything...you'll feel better about it
m 40 w 38 married 15 together 18 d11, d8 bomb 12/19/10 2nd bomb 3/30/11 COMPLETELY DONE
