I understand your feeling. You put so much effort to your family wellbeing, but your H is enjoying himself and did not even bother to tell you about his plan. Kim told me whoever put less in a R is in control. You need to detach and not emotionally affected by your H's action. By doing that your H may put more into the R. M is like seesaw. One partner put more, the other put less.
At the moment my W is in control. I need to learn to detach. I hope she will not feel pressured and do more to our R.
