Journalling again. I lost it with H last night, and hung up on him. I had a meeting last night, and H knew about it. Son was home, with no plans. The weather was bad, so I called as I left work, to let him know I was switching to the SUV. Told him to drive home carefully because the roads were beginning to ice up. Told son Dad was on his way home when I left. That was 6:00. Imagine my surprise when I pulled into the drive at 9:30, and H was still not there. Called him - he went to the bar to play pool. I told him this time I was upset. His answer "Aw, don't be mad. I'm leaving now." I replied "Do whatever you want to do" and hung up the phone. About 10 minutes later, I was calm enough to call back and apologize for hanging up on him. By the time he got home, we both pretended nothing was wrong. Just like Friday night, it was not worth him time to tell me of his plans, even though we were already talking! I would place odds on his being on his way to the bar as we talked earlier that evening. It's not as if I would force him to come home. In 18 years, I never have. I have always changed my schedule and plans to accomodate him. All I ever asked is that he tell me. Of course, I shouldn't be surprised, since he's never been able to do that. I told him Friday, I wanted the courtesy of a phone call, and he agreed that that was the right thing to do. Then, went on and on about the guy he ran into. Last night, I said nothing, and H didn't even try to apologize. It's really driving me nuts to think that I'm not worth the common courtesy of a phone call. I am having a real hard time getting past this "mad".
