She got on the call and really talked to Jody!!! That's huge!!!
You don't have to agree with everything you said. WASs love to look back and focus on the negatives, even do a little history rewriting. Even without that though you two will have different perspectives on some things. But that's a lot of insight to where she is now.
I can't remember where the 4 phases are listed on this site, but they are: reducing negative emotions; building friendship; rekindling romance; and recommitment. You can't jump straight to recommitment, and I LOVE your comment about how you aren't sure you would want her to come running back RIGHT NOW if she called. That's a very healthy attitude.
When my XH tried his brief half-a$$ed R during one of his break-ups with OW I let him set the pace and he set a pretty quick one got overwhelmed and freaked out (he later admitted it was because things were going too well and he realized things could actually work - ain't that ironic) and ran back to OW.
Now, you may not think that the convo really got you anywhere, but you won't see the effects for a while. In the meantime, expect that she might withdraw and process what's going on. Don't jump to any conclusions if you don't hear from her, or even if you hear anger. When the WAS really starts to see the changes you've made a lot of "too little, too late" and "why didn't you listen to me 3 years ago" type outbursts come out. Keep in mind that the opposite of love isn't hate, it's apathy. You have to be connected to someone to get angry at them, to let them get under your skin.
Hang in there!
Michelle - Proud DR Rockette S: 28JUL07, D'd: 29OCT09 http://tinyurl.com/27j9qo2
