VS, sorry for where you are. Don't reach out right now. I know that is a difficult place to be but you have to let him miss you. You have to let him realize what he's giving up.
If you keep pursuing, all he will see is a nag and justify his reason for leaving.
I let mine go and find out that life isn't as great as she thought it was.
It was hard but I had to do it. Keep yourself busy so you don't think about it - it will make the time go much faster.
Keep coming to these boards too. There are some great people in the EXACT same sitch as you and can help when you are near the ledge.
m 40 w 38 married 15 together 18 d11, d8 bomb 12/19/10 2nd bomb 3/30/11 COMPLETELY DONE
Thank You.... He text me when he landed in PA...I replyed that I was busy and that I would get back to him. He text again telling me how cold it was (we live in So Cal.) I waited 90 minutes and told him to stay warm. No reply. I feel like I "gave in" He complains that I ignore him. Then I feel ignored when I give my respose so time. I did do a good thing, I cleaned and organizes to HUGE closets. Got rid of a lot...nothing of his. It felt good. Now I wonder what he will think when he returns...What the heck is she doing?????
me:51 H: 48 No kids together M:14 years seperated:Ask him to GET OUT 3/21/11 Piecing 09/14
feeling sick and out of sorts. H is due home Sunday. I have lost 40lbs in 5 weeks and look sick. How should I act??? How long to he gives me an answer one way or another.
me:51 H: 48 No kids together M:14 years seperated:Ask him to GET OUT 3/21/11 Piecing 09/14
I'm going to be sick. My husband just informed me that he has to fly to Dallas and then drive to Oklahoma. OW lives in Dallas. Now what? I need help. It feels like the walls are closing in on me
me:51 H: 48 No kids together M:14 years seperated:Ask him to GET OUT 3/21/11 Piecing 09/14
You aren't going to like what I'm going to say, but if his intent is to see the OP in Dallas, there is nothing you can do. Does it suck? BIG TIME!!!!
I know what it feels like being sick to your stomach. I get that way when I see my H phone number come up on caller ID. Then I flip the emotion to feeling sad for the entire situation because I know this doesn't have to happen. But like you, I have NO control and I have to let it be. He thinks he knows what he's doing and he doesn't.
He will see that the grass isn't so green. Just let him work thru his MLC. You are in for a bumpy ride but we are all here for you.
Sending you hugs and a better tommorrow.
BITS
M: 48, H: 42 Kids: 0 T: 20 yrs M: 16 yrs. (H's 1st, my 2nd) WAS/MLC: 12/7/09-I'm not the wife HE deserved Came home per L: 12/26/09, Left again: 2/6/10 Served: 10/21/10, D FINAL: 6/15/11
Why does he not just come out and tell me? Why do I have to PI everything? He told me in Dec. That he wanted a divorce, our marriage was a mistake...blah blah blah. He even told me that he rented his place in dec. Still has moved a thing. He sleeps on the couch every night. I feel if I just KNEW, I would be in a better place
me:51 H: 48 No kids together M:14 years seperated:Ask him to GET OUT 3/21/11 Piecing 09/14
VS - I understand and I have to say that I am stumped on an answer for you.
Board vets any suggestions?
BITS
M: 48, H: 42 Kids: 0 T: 20 yrs M: 16 yrs. (H's 1st, my 2nd) WAS/MLC: 12/7/09-I'm not the wife HE deserved Came home per L: 12/26/09, Left again: 2/6/10 Served: 10/21/10, D FINAL: 6/15/11
I did the "bad" and called him...no answer. He called back 10 minutes later and was somewhat short, said he had a headache and wanted to go to bed. I wished him a good night. 40 minutes later, I get a text from him "good night" so confused. This is MY house before marriage, he said he rented a place...6 weeks and he still hasn't left. I need answers. How soon is to soon to ask "again"? I did last Sunday, and he told me if I wanted/needed resolve he would leave. Heart aching
me:51 H: 48 No kids together M:14 years seperated:Ask him to GET OUT 3/21/11 Piecing 09/14
Well...Still in a funk. Husband returned from his trip and was nice enough. We hung out at a superbowl party. The tension is so thick it is killing me. It has been 6 weeks since the bomb. Why is he acting as if everything is good, but we have seperate sleeping arrangements. He did make mention that I was "a busy beaver" while I was gone....all closets cleaned and bathroom repainted. How long do I have to go on like this before I ask him AGAIN what his intentions are???? I can barely work
me:51 H: 48 No kids together M:14 years seperated:Ask him to GET OUT 3/21/11 Piecing 09/14
